Tuesday, February 9, 2010

Powerful Letter from Martin Grossman about spending Hanukkah on Death Row

Powerful Letter from Martin Grossman about spending Hanukkah on Death Row


Martin Grossman, on the Day of His Bar Mitzvah



Martin wrote the following powerful and poignant lette to his Aunt Rosol, Hanukkah, 2008.
“Dear Tantellaski, Chanukkah Night

Feelin (drawing of a sad face with tears)

Happy Chanukkah,

May this wacky letter find you all in great spirituality and healthfulness.

Really missin’ my mammalaski…

Thank you… for the unexpected $50.00 gelt,

And the book of cute holiday stamps.

Thank you…. for the love and wishes for Chanukkah.

Be forwarned, the other page enclosed was scribbled

during, shortly after my watching 2 Chanukkah specials on P.B.S.

Please photocopy and give one to Rhonda for me.

Maybe she’d want to include it in the documentary?

I’m outta here.

May the lord always be with, bless, love and protect you always.

Love always,

Martin

I have just been blessed to view two Chanukkah programs on P.B.S.

1) “A Chunukkah Celebration” hosted by the beautiful Fran Drescher.

2) “Lights Celebrate Hanukkah Live Concert 2008”

The following are some raw emotions during/after my viewing:

Being able to feel such sadness and heartache at one point during

Chanukkah - or this is the first Chanukkah without my dear mother…

and quite probably “my very last Chanukkah” due to my situation!

But to also feel such joy/pain, pride/regret, watching all of the beautiful

children and young adults singing the blessings – -

I am overwhelmed by a wave of emotion,

my heart begins to swell, my throat tighten up,

and all of these damn cold tears stream down my cheeks

instantly I have been reduced to a blubbering mess.

Something so moving, so beautiful,

yet also so very painful and bittersweet

the absolute reality of my loneliness takes hold of me,

for the first time in 24 years I now feel its’ total being!

No one to share the miracle with —

No wife, No girlfriend, No children

No fellowship here in Death Row – i am all alone here amongst 300 + !

No candles to light, No menorah, No Dreidel to spin (the remants of my youth)

No latkes, g-d how i miss the latkes.

Please understand this is how i your brother in Judaism must endure …

I am but an island of Judaism here,

self supporting, self reliant, steadfast in my beliefs, observances.

Lord I long for my own maccabean miracle,

surviving in my existence for over 24 years and counting, quite a feat,

(Insert: Unable to read this line)

Instantly I have been reduced to a blubbering mess.

Something so moving, so beautiful,

Yet also oh so very painful and bittersweet

The absolute reality of my loneliness takes hold of me,

For the first time in 24 years I now feel its’ total being!

No one to share the miracle with –

No wife, No Girlfriend, No Children,

No fellowship here in Death Row – I am all alone here amongst 300 + !

No latkes, g-d how i miss the latkes.

Please understand this is how i your brother in Judaism must endure …

I am, but an island of Judaism here,

Self supporting, self reliant, steadfast in my beliefs, observances.

Lord I long for my own maccabean miracle,

Surviving in my existence for over 24 years and counting, quite a feat

g-d willing I might still have more survival aspects to mount.

Martin Edward Grossman #A089742

On Chanukkah Kislev 25. 5769.”

No comments: